Ralph Dibny Presents: Freakazoid!

Image by Phil Crash Murphy

For the foreseeable future, Freakazoid! seems basically an extinguished property. Nobody has heard anything about a revival series (who wouldn't love to see Weird Al involved in the project, huh?), or even a comic book adaptation. So, I started daydreaming about how would it look in the solicitations articles with really cool writers and artists, I wrote down the whole thing, and now humbly present the result to you, my dear audience (yeah, I'm talking to both of you). 

In order to take the series forward and add something new, I set the fake series in the DC Universe and explored events right after "The Chip" (the origin story of Freakazoid!) and between other actual stories of the show, in order to get a taste of the early days of Freakazoid!, the origin of several villains and team-up with DC characters. There is a lot of that Spider-Man / Archie vibe (i.e., lots of high school stuff) from the early Brice Timm concepts and the first episode. Things are surreal, but not enough to keep Freakazoid apart from the DC Universe, so expect interesting guest stars...

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #1
On sale MAY 12 • Issue #2 on sale MAY 26 • 40 pg (#1), 44 pg (#2), FC, $2.99 US
Written by JOHN P. MCCANN, PAUL DINI, TOM RUEGGER and PAUL RUGG art by BRUCE TIMM and KEVIN MAGUIRE, cover by BRUCE TIMM and ALEX ROSS.

I did this image, (totally ripping of Alex Ross).

Teenager Dexter Douglas wakes up to discover that everybody in Washington is talking about the cool new hero that caused the fall of the Apex Company (Cadmus' main supplier). He wants nothing to do with him, but he changes his mind when he discovers that his biology teacher is planning to turn all the Harry Connick Jr. High School students into lobe-mutants like him.

Meanwhile, in the backup feature, Lord Bravery is trying to make a name for himself as London's new superhero protector. He captures a bank robbery; however, surrounded by inept witnesses, he has a really hard time trying to prove to the police that he captured the right thief, who shamelessly denies any involvement.

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #2
On sale MAY 26, 32 pg (#2), FC, $2.99 US
Written by JOHN P. MCCANN, PAUL DINI, TOM RUEGGER and PAUL RUGG art by KEVIN MAGUIRE.

The Lobe is planning to use his army of teenage brain-zombies to take Washington, but before stopping him, Freakazoid! must escape the thread of the disgusting Booger Beast.

Meanwhile, in the backup feature, the Huntsman has gathered all the necessary information to take down Armondo Guitierrez, the corrupt CEO of the Apex Company. So, he joins forces with the Flash, Green Arrow, Blue Beetle, Black Ca-- Nope, some new superhero already beat them to it. Darn the Luck, darn, darn, darn!

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #3
On sale JUL 18, 32 pg (#2), FC, $2.99 US
Written by JOHN P. MCCANN and PAUL RUGG art by DUSTIN NGUYEN.

Freakazoid! has saved the Harry Connick Jr. High again. This time, from Cave Guy at the "Day Time Saving Party". Even though every girl is in love with him, he can't reveal them that he's actually Dexter Douglas, the geek none of them likes. So, it's time to help Dex to fit in, and nothing is more important that... Well, maybe only saving some bank hostages from Kid Carrion, the cowboy who can't die.

Meanwhile, in the backup feature, after 3 weeks of talking to bullies into leaving obese kids alone, The Fatman and Boy Blubber get a restraining order from the Peabody Elementary School.

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #4
On sale JUN 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by PAUL DINI art by KEVIN MAGUIRE.

The Penguin goes to Washington to recruit Arms Akimbo, Babyface, Ma Murder and other generic mobster stereotypes for the Crime Guild of America, and we all know what that means: Batman team-up!!

Meanwhile, in the backup feature, Dexter brags to James and Leo (those are actual characters, I swear) that he's a close friend of Freakazoid. Next day, the entire Harry Connick Jr. High knows, so, best friends Betty and Vero-- I mean, Steff and Valerie start a war with each other in order to impress Dex.

SHADOW OF THE BAT #3
On sale JUN 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by PAUL DINI, art by DUSTIN NGUYEN.
Crossing over from DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID!, Freak! and Nightwing break into a Washington D.C. warehouse just in time to save Batman from a surreal gang organized in true Daffy Duck fashion: the Penguin! Arms Akimbo! The Ventriloquist and Scarface! The Lobe! Babyface! Medulla and Oblongata! Ma Murder!Ugly Manheim! Alpha Dog! The White Rabbit! Kid Carrion! Rhino! Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum! The Chick! Ben Franklinstein! Tobias Whale!

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #5
On sale AUG 13, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by JOHN P. MCCANN and PAUL RUGG art by DUSTIN NGUYEN.

After saving the White House, Freakazoid! is invited by president Obama to receive an award. At the ceremony, Freakazoid! notices that the Senate Majority Leader is a weird eyeball creature with goo instead of a body and a ridiculous haircut -- but everybody else sees him as a regular guy called Newt... what the hey is going on, and what's he got to do with the sinister looking guy turning squirrels into gold?

Meanwhile, in the backup feature, Batman has been kidnapped by the American Crime Syndicate and only The Huntsman can track him down.

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #6
On sale SEP 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by PAUL DINI and PAUL RUGG art by DARWYN COOKE. 

Ultimate hunter Major Danger hears about the Freakazoid! and decides to hunt him, so, suck it, Kraven the Hunter! 

Meanwhile, at the backup feature, Lord Bravery is about to bust a smuggling operation of the Pearly Prince* --but so is the Beefeater.

*From Batman & Robin.

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #7
On sale OCT 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by JOHN P. MCCANN and PAUL RUGG art by DUSTIN NGUYEN. 
Freakazoid! has to figure out how to teach Dexter Douglas to stand for himself against the Harry Connick Jr. High School's resident bully: Duncan Douglas (small world, eh?), but he can't really do that while being bullied himself by Alpha Dog the biggest, meanest crimelord of Washington.

Meanwhile, at the backup feature, the Lawn Gnomes have stolen the one true nose ring from a mad halfling.

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #8
On sale NOV 01, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by ALAN BURNETT art by ADAM HUGHES.
"Candle Jack's Halloween Par--"

Steff and Val organize a Halloween party and Dex thought it would be a good idea to dress as Freakazoid! to impress them, the only problem is that when some idiot shows up disguised as Candle Ja--

Meanwhile, at the backup feature, Lord Bravery and his family are invited as guests at the Stokesey Castle, where, as he asures them, there are no ghosts...

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #9
On sale DEC 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by JOHN P. MCCANN and PAUL RUGG art by DUSTIN NGUYEN.
"Merry Christmas, Freak!"
It's almost a year since Freakazoid! came to be, an what better present can Armondo sent him from prison than a surprise party with all his new friends: the Lobe, Candle Jack, Kid Carrion, Longhorn, Cobra Queen, Caveguy and Booger Beast!

Meanwhile, at the Backup feature, it's Christmas and the Lt. King is going to get the Huntsman the gift he deserves (although there might be some teasing before).

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #10
On sale JAN 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by JOHN P. MCCANN and PAUL RUGG art by DUSTIN NGUYEN.
"Freakazoid Vs. -- Freakazoid?"
Eye of Newt has decided that the best way to get Freakazoid! out of his back is to frame him, so he hires Deadpan, the World's less expressive impersonator, to ruin his reputation. 

Meanwhile, at the Backup feature, the Lawn Gnomes go to Manhattan... if they can get pass the Brooklyn Bridge Troll.

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #11
On sale FEB 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by TOM RUEGGER and PAUL RUGG art by KEVIN MAGUIRE.
"Freakazoid, the super villain"
When Freakazoid! becomes evil Sgt. Cosgrove is forced to apprehend him. Can Roddy and Steff break Cobra Queen's hypnosis on time? Plus, we learn that Cosgrove is actually Police Chief, but he likes to be called Sgt., for some reason. 

Meanwhile, at the backup feature, it's time to give sweet and innocent Toby Danger "the talk" (if you get what I mean).


DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #12
On sale MAR 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by JOHN P. MCCANN and PAUL RUGG art by DUSTIN NGUYEN.
"It's tough to get a date with Dex"
Dex hit the jackpot when his math teacher forced Val to study with him every afternoon, and to make things more interesting, Longhorn is going to teach him how to get hard to play as he needs to excuse himself to go save the landmarks Washington D.C. 

Meanwhile, at the Backup feature, Fatman and Boy Blubber open a fat camp, a good idea, only all the kids are healthier than both of them...

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #13
On sale APR 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by JOHN P. MCCANN and PAUL RUGG art by DUSTIN NGUYEN.
"Candle Jack Retur--"
Waylon Jeepers found a way to control Candle Jack withou--

Fanboy might have bitten more than he can chew when he decided to stalk the Legends who Lunch.

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #14
On sale MAY 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by JOHN P. MCCANN and J. M. DEMATTEIS art by DUSTIN NGUYEN.
"Mystery of the missing Freak!"
When Freakazoid! disappears, only one man can help Sgt. Cosgrove and Roddy to find him: Ralph Dibny, the Elongated Man. However, not even the World's most famous detective can make things easier when most of the witnesses and suspects are clueless weirdos. 

Meanwhile, at the Backup feature, Lord Bravery sues a comic book writer who copyrighted his name and personality to sell toys.

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #15
On sale JUL 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by ALAN BURNETT and TOM RUEGGER art by DUSTIN NGUYEN.
"Neutrino Man"
Mo-Ron returns. This time, he arrives at James and Leo's who try to disguise him as an exchange student. However, their fun won't last long since the Lobe wants him for his own sinister purposes. Guest starring: Pauly Shore, as the guy who dies after the credits introduce him... (I told you).

Meanwhile, at the Backup feature, after a month of undercover hard work the Huntsman is about to make his big bust (yeah, that's right, not gonna happen).

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #16
On sale JUN 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by TOM RUEGGER and PAUL RUGG art by DUSTIN NGUYEN.

"Franklinstain"
The Lobe and Eye-of-Newt team-up to create the worst political Frankenstein: Ben Franklinstain. 

Meanwhile, at the Backup feature, Mistress Sinistra has caught the Lawn Gnomes, but keeping them as servants might not be a good idea.

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #17
On sale AUG 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by JOHN P. MCCANN and PAUL RUGG art by DUSTIN NGUYEN.
"The Imp-ossible Dream"
Dex is tired of being targeted by bullies and things are even worse since the worst bully is his own brother, Duncan Douglas. Things are about to change now that he has Frkzd, his own interdimensional imp... Then again, who's going to save him from the imp... Duncan?

Meanwhile, at the Backup feature, the Huntsman finally arrives on time to beat criminals. There's no doubt, they are real criminals. Sure thing.

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #18
On sale SEP 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by JOHN P. MCCANN and PAUL RUGG art by DUSTIN NGUYEN.
"Beauty and Brains"
Nerdator is back, and this time he has a better target: hot nerds. 

Meanwhile, at the backup feature, Fanboy has a new victim: Lord Bravery.

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #19
On sale OCT 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by JOHN P. MCCANN and PAUL RUGG art by DUSTIN NGUYEN.
"Beauty and the Booger Beast"
Val can accept that Steff is now Freakazoid!'s girlfriend, but is she desperate enough to fall in love with her biggest admirer... the Booger Beast? 

Meanwhile, at the backup feature, Lord Bravery is finally invited to join the Justice League Europe, only one problem: he has to beat Beefeater! John Cleese's reaction: "Unbelievable!" 

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #20
On sale OCT 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by JOHN P. MCCANN and PAUL RUGG art by DUSTIN NGUYEN.
"Beauty and the Booger Beast"
The fate of Ben Franklinstain has the nation divided, some people want him resting in peace again, some want him in jail and others want him to be the President. 

Meanwhile, at the backup feature, the Lawn Gnomes try to kidnap Zatanna's cat to get her to break their spell.

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #21
On sale DEC 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by JOHN P. MCCANN and ALAN BURNETT art by DUSTIN NGUYEN.
"Beauty and the Booger Beast"
Guitierrez is back, and he has kidnapped Roddy to fix his web connection. So, Freakazoid! and the Huntsman must find him before he becomes a freakazoid! again!

Meanwhile, at the backup feature, Fatman and Boy Blubber get banned from KFC.

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #22
On sale JAN 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by JOHN P. MCCANN and PAUL RUGG art by KEVIN MAGUIRE.

"Freakazoid! meets the Lawn Gnomes"
Candle Ja-- is after the Lawn Gnomes and only Freakazoid! can help them. 

Meanwhile, at the backup feature, the Douglas family goes camping and Duncan finds a green fat "big foot".

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #23
On sale JAN 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by PAUL DINI art by DARWYN COOKE.
"See No Invisivo"
Invisivo is super-charged and he's going after president Obama, so, Freakazoid! will stop him, if he can finish Professor's Beasthead's exam on time... and rescue Val from Booger Beast... and shake off Fanboy... and get Fatman out of a manhole... and try Mike's new papaya doughnut with Cosgrove... and -- oh, just forget about it, it's never gonna happen.

Meanwhile, at the backup feature, Lord Bravery has to prove to the HMRC that he doesn't make a profit as a superhero.

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #24
On sale FEB 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by JOHN P. MCCANN and PAUL RUGG art by DUSTIN NGUYEN.
"And they Smell like Mothballs"
The Green Fog and the Brown Fog are back and smellier than ever, so Freakazoid! decided to reunite... THE LEGENDS!... Then again, setting octogenarians to fight might not be a smart idea.

Meanwhile, at the backup feature, the The Huntsman has received his first call from the Justice League Unlimited. Nope, wrong person. They meant to call the Huntress.

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #25
On sale MAR 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by PAUL DINI and TOM RUEGGER art by BRUCE TIMM.
"Witch Girl, the Teenage Witch"

Witch Girl is back at the Harry Connick Jr. High School, the only problem is that nobody remembers her being an evil sorcerer from the 5th dimension. Nobody but Val. So it's up to her to prove it to the gang.

Meanwhile, at the Backup Feature, Professor Jones thinks the Old Whispering Lady stole his collection of pez dispensers, despite Officers Dan and Muhammad-Abdul knowing better, so it's up to Cosgrove to get to the bottom of this goofy dispute.

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #26
On sale APR 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by PAUL DINI and JOHN P. MCCANN art by ADAM HUGHES.
"Freakazette"

With all the boys letting Bombshell go whenever she commits a crime, Washington needs a new type of hero: Freakazette. Wait... is she Steff... or Val? Special appearance by Foamy and Professor Heiney.

Meanwhile, at the Backup Feature, when Sandra Danger gets possesed by Vorn, the Unspeakable by mistake, the Vatican assigns its toughest agents to the case: the Nunchucks .
DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #27
On sale MAY 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by JOHN P. MCCANN and PAUL RUGG art by HOWARD PORTER.
"Expendable People"

Art and characters created by lazymills1986.

Candle Jack... Deadpan... Kid Carrion... Ben Franklinstain... The superhero job is way too much for Freak. It's time to get a sidekick. So, Ingmar prepares trials for the most skilled people in sidekick biz: Fanboy, Deadpan, Arrowette, and Expendable Kid must compete with each other to apprehend the Spamming Baby Gang-man. 

Meanwhile, at the backup feature, the Lawn Gnomes team-up with Etrigan to bully Klarion the Witch Boy, if they can get past Teekl. 

Superheroes and their mythos

I have often wondered what makes a new comic book character (or a returning one that had faded) stick around. So far, my conclusion is that a breakthrough run will make him relevant; however, a rich mythos is key to make him stay past the first writer. Think about it, what do Batman, Superman, Spider-man, the X-men, have in common that characters like Aquaman and specially the Martian Manhunter lack? They all have a great rogues gallery, well known supporting cast, popular technology and locations.

Ok, it's fan-made, but you get the idea. (Art by Jeff Pina).

The problem with B-listers is that writers always try to create new elements for their mythos without embracing and revamping classic ones. They often move forward those characters, which is correct, without taking a look to the basics. When somebody mentions Batman, concepts like the Joker, Robin, Alfred, The Bat-cave, the Penguin, Catwoman, Commissioner Gordon, the Bat-signal and Gotham City come up immediately; when somebody mentions the Martian Manhunter... Exactly. This is why it would be good to revisit Professor Hugo, Mr. V or the Idol-Head of Diabolu in addition to creating new guys like Ma'alefa'ak. Aquaman would be an example of somebody in the middle, he has a fairly developed supporting cast and setting, but when it comes to his rogues gallery, most people draw a blank after two of them.

Now, Ralph is an animal of another species. Like Sherlock, all he needs is a sidekick (Watson, Sue) and interesting mysteries to solve. Most detectives share a similar formula. This is why writers were always able to recreate the vibe of his original series way after it ended. However, given that Ralph is a superhero, and I have nothing better to do I decided to merge the case-driven detective formula with the mythos-driven superhero formula to produce a series of fake solicitations. Here is the mythos I conceived for him:

SETTING

The Dibnys hard traveling years are over, so, they decided to settle in New York City, at the Dearbon Building, property of Sue's parents and located on 5th Ave. in front of Cantral Park and the Guggenheim. However, old habits die had, so half their adventures will take place all over the world. Frequent destinies include Waymore, NE birthplace of Ralph, and Yucatan, birthplace of the Elongated Man.

In this case, the fake stories are set in the fake Earth-J, named after Julie Schwartz, where its still the 60s and most of the DC heroes are just debuting.

SUPPORTING CAST

Ralph and Sue basically know everybody who is anybody in the DC Universe on a secret identity basis. Ralph is very specially tight with the Flash and Batman; however, only a handful of characters get to appear in almost every adventure of his fake series.

Sue Dearbon - Ralph's wife and sidekick. She's very plucky and talented. She is an authority on fashion, mystery writing and computer hacking.

Frazier - See the villains section.

J. J. Dearbon - Sue's dad and landlord. He came from Ireland with nothing on his pockets and now he's one of the richest men in the world. He has a loud, big bear type of jolly personality. However, he can be quite greedy ans is always exploring new ways to make money all around the world.

Caroline Dearbon (neé Astor) - Sue's clueless mother. Despite being very perceptive, she's quite clueless and she's normally sitting around in a perpetually good mood making unintentionally hurtful but honest comments.

Chief Clancy O'Hara - Cousin of Gotham City's Miles O'Hara, the clueless, stubborn and short tempered police chief of NYC, he calls the Elongated Man when crimes become unsolvable.

THE COMMON SUSPECTS

I figured common suspects would ruin the mystery, but even Sherlock has a Moriarty, right? Ralph has stated that he avoids supervillains on purpose for his own safety reasons, but how about a crowd of lovable thugs like Batman used to have in the 60s?

There's just one true villain here, and that's the big mystery of the first season, the rest are just con men and petty people.

???? - The "Moriarty" I was talking about. Just like Ralph solves mysteries for the thrill of the challenge, his enemy should manipulate all crime in the Eastern Seaboard just for fun. In the first big arc a number of villains will be introduced and Ralph will have to find out his identity.

Frazier - Ralph and Sue's old pet dog comes back with a twist. He's the Thin Man's Asta gone narcissistically wrong. In this fake continuity he's a Westie, since I don't think a Jack Russell can pull evil or has the required personality. If he was a regular villain, he would be too much for any superhero, but being just a dog, his silly instincts hold him back.

Egghead - Think of characters like Frasier Crane, Hackman's Luthor, Megamind, the Brain (from Pinky and the Brain) and, of course, the real deal, as portrayed by the great Vincent Price. He used to be a supervillain in Gotham, but now he's reformed and lives at the Dearbon Building along with the Dibnys, so his role is mostly that of an obnoxious neighbor and radio talk-show personality.

Miss Bacon - Egghead's infatuated secretary. She types for the posterity almost anything his eggocentric boss says. Their relationship is quite unprofessional, if you know what I mean, and she enjoys hinting people about that.

Mistress Sinestra - A local TV personality with secret witch powers. Basically a cross between Magica De Spell, Elvira and Fran Fine. She's obsessed with fortunes, spells and curses, so she's a constant pain for the Dearbons.

The Elongated Evildoer - Martin Beene. One of the few notable original enemies of Ralph. Obsessed with the Elongated Man for no good reason, he discovered a way to elongate things that he has touched. However, since that's a silly power, this time he comes back with regular stretching superpowers. He knows more than Ralph about stretching, but he's quite incompetent as a criminal, which frustrated him even more.

The Clinton Boys - 3 of them used to be "the Untouchables", who battled Ralph, Superman, Robin and Hawk and Dove, but they reintegrated with their family in Hell's Kitchen to become the largest gang of thieves / carpet cleaners (don't ask) in the NY metropolitan area.

M. M. Pennypacker - More of a frienemy of J. J. Dearbon, Sue's dad. He's his evil counterpart from Australia; the Flintheart Glomgold to his Scrooge McDuck. The main source of his wealth is news media, which is how he manages to stay clean depite being a crook.

Average Joe - Joseph Jones, and average looking man. He commits clean, practical crimes leaving no traces,   the perfect challenge for Ralph.

Rajah - A magician / hypnotist from the old Elongated Man stories. Magicians make great challenges for detectives, so this one is a natural.

L'Escargot - France loves the Elongated Man, and believe it or not, this guy is one of Frances biggest super criminals (true story, look it up).

Kukulk'caan - An ancient alien who once enslaved the Mayans. He created the gingo fruit that gave Ralph his super powers and his ship keeps attracting aliens to Yucatan.

Maximo Molina - Yet another megalomaniac trying to conquer the world, this one acts like an eccentric hacendado from Yucatan. Basically the local Prince John.

Edgar Moriarty - This creepy guy is the head of Scotland Yard. However, his family name makes him an obvious prime suspect.

The Grünewappen family - They are secretly the wealthiest family on Earth, but their status is threatened by the rise of a new criminal mastermind of Europe.

RECURRING CHARACTERS

The Super-Hero League of New York - Also known as the Super Buddies, an association of New York-based superheroes who offer free services to the community. Ralph and Sue work here in order to use its resources. The list of members is really long, but the common suspects include Power Girl, Blue Beetle, Booster Gold, Fire, Ice, Rocket Red (exchange member) and Guy Gardner. It is managed by the sleazy Maxwell Lord, along with L-Ron and Oberon.


Billy Warner - Ralph's #1 fan from the old stories. He lives in Astoria, Queens and wants to become a master detective like his idol. His body also reacts to gingo extract with elasticity, only he promised Ralph not to use his powers until he becomes a pro.

The Flash - Ralph's bro. He often calls when a mystery gets too complicated at Central City or visits just to hang around.

Batman - The other Worlds greatest detective. They often have to team-up when mysteries get too complicated.


The Croatoan Society - A league of Detectives who gather annually to solve paranormal mysteries. The original members were Ralph, Detective Chimp, Edogawa Sangaku, Dr. 13 and Tim Tranch. Sherlock Holmes, the Question, Filo Molina and the Dog joined eventually.

P. I. Butch "Dog" Douglas - NYC's former top detective. He's not that talented as a detective, but he makes up for it with dog-based super powers.

Speedy Gonzalez - Yucatan's champion, and the first speedster and superhero Ralph met. His powers also comes from a fruit, in this case Yucatecan chilli pepper.

Don Eduardo - Ralph's host in Yucatan. He's old and very knowledgeable on everything about Yucatan, so he serves as the resident guide. He's a great host, but is set in his conventional ways, so he finds Ralph's shenanigans obnoxious.

Filo Molina - A friend of don Eduardo and Yucatan's top detective. He's a retired trauma doctor who solves crimes on his free time.

Amos Hurd, the Millionaire Cowboy - A friend of Ralph from his old adventures. Pretty much the J. J. Dearbon of Texas.

The Justice League of America - The elite super-hero team of America, so, obviously, Ralph belongs to it. Its roster includes Batman, Superman, Wonder Woman, Aquaman, Robin, Green Lantern, Flash, the Martian, the Green Arrow, Atom, Hawkman and Black Canary. Zatanna joins along with Ralph, and eventually it will also include Hawkwoman, John Stewart, Firestrorm, Cyborg, Samurai, Apache Chief, Black Lightning, Supergirl, Enchantress and Platinum.