Tuesday, August 5, 2014

Ralph Dibny Presents: Freakazoid!

Image by Phil Crash Murphy


For the foreseeable future, Freakazoid! seems basically an extinguished property. Nobody has heard anything about a revival series (who wouldn't love to see Weird Al involved in the project, huh?), or even a comic book adaptation. So, I started daydreaming about how would it look in the solicitations articles with really cool writers and artists, I wrote down the whole thing, and now humbly present the result to you, my dear audience (yeah, I'm talking to both of you). 




In order to take the series forward and add something new, I set the fake series in the DC Universe and explored events right after "The Chip" (the origin story of Freakazoid!) and between other actual stories of the show, in order to get a taste of the early days of Freakazoid!, the origin of several villains and team-up with DC characters. There is a lot of that Spider-Man / Archie vibe (i.e., lots of high school stuff) from the early Brice Timm concepts and the first episode. Things are surreal, but not enough to keep Freakazoid apart from the DC Universe, so expect interesting guest stars...



DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #1
On sale MAY 12 • Issue #2 on sale MAY 26 • 40 pg (#1), 44 pg (#2), FC, $2.99 US
Written by JOHN P. MCCANN, PAUL DINI, TOM RUEGGER and PAUL RUGG art by BRUCE TIMM and KEVIN MAGUIRE, cover by BRUCE TIMM and ALEX ROSS.
I did this image, (totally ripping of Alex Ross).
Teenager Dexter Douglas wakes up to discover that everybody in Washington is talking about the cool new hero that caused the fall of the Apex Company (Cadmus' main supplier). He wants nothing to do with him, but he changes his mind when he discovers that his biology teacher is planning to turn all the Harry Connick Jr. High School students into lobe-mutants like him.

Meanwhile, in the backup feature, Lord Bravery is trying to make a name for himself as London's new superhero protector. He captures a bank robbery; however, surrounded by inept witnesses, he has a really hard time trying to prove to the police that he captured the right thief, who shamelessly denies any involvement.

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #2
On sale MAY 26, 32 pg (#2), FC, $2.99 US
Written by JOHN P. MCCANN, PAUL DINI, TOM RUEGGER and PAUL RUGG art by KEVIN MAGUIRE.
The Lobe is planning to use his army of teenage brain-zombies to take Washington, but before stopping him, Freakazoid! must escape the thread of the disgusting Booger Beast.

Meanwhile, in the backup feature, the Huntsman has gathered all the necessary information to take down Armondo Guitierrez, the corrupt CEO of the Apex Company. So, he joins forces with the Flash, Green Arrow, Blue Beetle, Black Ca-- Nope, some new superhero already beat them to it. Darn the Luck, darn, darn, darn!

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #3
On sale JUL 18, 32 pg (#2), FC, $2.99 US
Written by JOHN P. MCCANN and PAUL RUGG art by DUSTIN NGUYEN.
Freakazoid! has saved the Harry Connick Jr. High again. This time, from Cave Guy at the "Day Time Saving Party". Even though every girl is in love with him, he can't reveal them that he's actually Dexter Douglas, the geek none of them likes. So, it's time to help Dex to fit in, and nothing is more important that... Well, maybe only saving some bank hostages from Kid Carrion, the cowboy who can't die.

Meanwhile, in the backup feature, after 3 weeks of talking to bullies into leaving obese kids alone, The Fatman and Boy Blubber get a restraining order from the Peabody Elementary School.

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #4
On sale JUN 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by PAUL DINI art by KEVIN MAGUIRE.
The Penguin goes to Washington to recruit Arms Akimbo, Babyface, Ma Murder and other generic mobster stereotypes for the Crime Guild of America, and we all know what that means: Batman team-up!!

Meanwhile, in the backup feature, Dexter brags to James and Leo (those are actual characters, I swear) that he's a close friend of Freakazoid. Next day, the entire Harry Connick Jr. High knows, so, best friends Betty and Vero-- I mean, Steff and Valerie start a war with each other in order to impress Dex.

SHADOW OF THE BAT #3
On sale JUN 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by PAUL DINI, art by DUSTIN NGUYEN.
Crossing over from DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID!, Freak! and Nightwing break into a Washington D.C. warehouse just in time to save Batman from a surreal gang organized in true Daffy Duck fashion: the PenguinArms AkimboThe Ventriloquist and ScarfaceThe LobeBabyfaceMedulla and OblongataMa Murder!Ugly Manheim! Alpha Dog! The White RabbitKid CarrionRhinoTweedle Dee and Tweedle DumThe ChickBen FranklinsteinTobias Whale!

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #5
On sale AUG 13, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by JOHN P. MCCANN and PAUL RUGG art by DUSTIN NGUYEN.
After saving the White House, Freakazoid! is invited by president Obama to receive an award. At the ceremony, Freakazoid! notices that the Senate Majority Leader is a weird eyeball creature with goo instead of a body and a ridiculous haircut -- but everybody else sees him as a regular guy called Newt... what the hey is going on, and what's he got to do with the sinister looking guy turning squirrels into gold?

Meanwhile, in the backup feature, Batman has been kidnapped by the American Crime Syndicate and only The Huntsman can track him down.

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #6
On sale SEP 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by PAUL DINI and PAUL RUGG art by DARWYN COOKE. 
Ultimate hunter Major Danger hears about the Freakazoid! and decides to hunt him, so, suck it, Kraven the Hunter! 

Meanwhile, at the backup feature, Lord Bravery is about to bust a smuggling operation of the Pearly Prince* --but so is the Beefeater.

*From Batman & Robin.

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #7
On sale OCT 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by JOHN P. MCCANN and PAUL RUGG art by DUSTIN NGUYEN. 
Freakazoid! has to figure out how to teach Dexter Douglas to stand for himself against the Harry Connick Jr. High School's resident bully: Duncan Douglas (small world, eh?), but he can't really do that while being bullied himself by Alpha Dog the biggest, meanest crimelord of Washington.

Meanwhile, at the backup feature, the Lawn Gnomes have stolen the one true nose ring from a mad halfling.

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #8
On sale NOV 01, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by ALAN BURNETT art by ADAM HUGHES.
"Candle Jack's Halloween Par--"

Steff and Val organize a Halloween party and Dex thought it would be a good idea to dress as Freakazoid! to impress them, the only problem is that when some idiot shows up disguised as Candle Ja--

Meanwhile, at the backup feature, Lord Bravery and his family are invited as guests at the Stokesey Castle, where, as he asures them, there are no ghosts...

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #9
On sale DEC 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by JOHN P. MCCANN and PAUL RUGG art by DUSTIN NGUYEN.
"Merry Christmas, Freak!"
It's almost a year since Freakazoid! came to be, an what better present can Armondo sent him from prison than a surprise party with all his new friends: the Lobe, Candle Jack, Kid Carrion, Longhorn, Cobra Queen, Caveguy and Booger Beast!

Meanwhile, at the Backup feature, it's Christmas and the Lt. King is going to get the Huntsman the gift he deserves (although there might be some teasing before).

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #10
On sale JAN 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by JOHN P. MCCANN and PAUL RUGG art by DUSTIN NGUYEN.
"Freakazoid Vs. -- Freakazoid?"
Eye of Newt has decided that the best way to get Freakazoid! out of his back is to frame him, so he hires Deadpan, the World's less expressive impersonator, to ruin his reputation. 

Meanwhile, at the Backup feature, the Lawn Gnomes go to Manhattan... if they can get pass the Brooklyn Bridge Troll.

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #11
On sale FEB 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by TOM RUEGGER and PAUL RUGG art by KEVIN MAGUIRE.
"Freakazoid, the super villain"
When Freakazoid! becomes evil Sgt. Cosgrove is forced to apprehend him. Can Roddy and Steff break Cobra Queen's hypnosis on time? Plus, we learn that Cosgrove is actually Police Chief, but he likes to be called Sgt., for some reason. 

Meanwhile, at the backup feature, it's time to give sweet and innocent Toby Danger "the talk" (if you get what I mean).


DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #12
On sale MAR 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by JOHN P. MCCANN and PAUL RUGG art by DUSTIN NGUYEN.
"It's tough to get a date with Dex"
Dex hit the jackpot when his math teacher forced Val to study with him every afternoon, and to make things more interesting, Longhorn is going to teach him how to get hard to play as he needs to excuse himself to go save the landmarks Washington D.C. 

Meanwhile, at the Backup feature, Fatman and Boy Blubber open a fat camp, a good idea, only all the kids are healthier than both of them...

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #13
On sale APR 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by JOHN P. MCCANN and PAUL RUGG art by DUSTIN NGUYEN.
"Candle Jack Retur--"
Waylon Jeepers found a way to control Candle Jack withou--

Fanboy might have bitten more than he can chew when he decided to stalk the Legends who Lunch.

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #14
On sale MAY 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by JOHN P. MCCANN and J. M. DEMATTEIS art by DUSTIN NGUYEN.
"Mystery of the missing Freak!"
When Freakazoid! disappears, only one man can help Sgt. Cosgrove and Roddy to find him: Ralph Dibny, the Elongated Man. However, not even the World's most famous detective can make things easier when most of the witnesses and suspects are clueless weirdos. 

Meanwhile, at the Backup feature, Lord Bravery sues a comic book writer who copyrighted his name and personality to sell toys.

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #15
On sale JUL 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by ALAN BURNETT and TOM RUEGGER art by DUSTIN NGUYEN.
"Neutrino Man"
Mo-Ron returns. This time, he arrives at James and Leo's who try to disguise him as an exchange student. However, their fun won't last long since the Lobe wants him for his own sinister purposes. Guest starring: Pauly Shore, as the guy who dies after the credits introduce him... (I told you).

Meanwhile, at the Backup feature, after a month of undercover hard work the Huntsman is about to make his big bust (yeah, that's right, not gonna happen).

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #16
On sale JUN 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by TOM RUEGGER and PAUL RUGG art by DUSTIN NGUYEN.

"Franklinstain"

The Lobe and Eye-of-Newt team-up to create the worst political Frankenstein: Ben Franklinstain

Meanwhile, at the Backup feature, Mistress Sinistra has caught the Lawn Gnomes, but keeping them as servants might not be a good idea.

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #17
On sale AUG 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by JOHN P. MCCANN and PAUL RUGG art by DUSTIN NGUYEN.
"The Imp-ossible Dream"
Dex is tired of being targeted by bullies and things are even worse since the worst bully is his own brother, Duncan Douglas. Things are about to change now that he has Frkzd, his own interdimensional imp... Then again, who's going to save him from the imp... Duncan?

Meanwhile, at the Backup feature, the Huntsman finally arrives on time to beat criminals. There's no doubt, they are real criminals. Sure thing.

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #18
On sale SEP 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by JOHN P. MCCANN and PAUL RUGG art by DUSTIN NGUYEN.
"Beauty and Brains"
Nerdator is back, and this time he has a better target: hot nerds. 

Meanwhile, at the backup feature, Fanboy has a new victim: Lord Bravery.

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #19
On sale OCT 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by JOHN P. MCCANN and PAUL RUGG art by DUSTIN NGUYEN.
"Beauty and the Booger Beast"
Val can accept that Steff is now Freakazoid!'s girlfriend, but is she desperate enough to fall in love with her biggest admirer... the Booger Beast

Meanwhile, at the backup feature, Lord Bravery is finally invited to join the Justice League Europe, only one problem: he has to beat Beefeater! John Cleese's reaction: "Unbelievable!" 

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #20
On sale OCT 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by JOHN P. MCCANN and PAUL RUGG art by DUSTIN NGUYEN.
"Beauty and the Booger Beast"
The fate of Ben Franklinstain has the nation divided, some people want him resting in peace again, some want him in jail and others want him to be the President. 

Meanwhile, at the backup feature, the Lawn Gnomes try to kidnap Zatanna's cat to get her to break their spell.

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #21
On sale DEC 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by JOHN P. MCCANN and ALAN BURNETT art by DUSTIN NGUYEN.
"Beauty and the Booger Beast"
Guitierrez is back, and he has kidnapped Roddy to fix his web connection. So, Freakazoid! and the Huntsman must find him before he becomes a freakazoid! again!

Meanwhile, at the backup feature, Fatman and Boy Blubber get banned from KFC.

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #22
On sale JAN 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by JOHN P. MCCANN and PAUL RUGG art by KEVIN MAGUIRE.
"Freakazoid! meets the Lawn Gnomes"
Candle Ja-- is after the Lawn Gnomes and only Freakazoid! can help them. 

Meanwhile, at the backup feature, the Douglas family goes camping and Duncan finds a green fat "big foot".

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #23
On sale JAN 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by PAUL DINI art by DARWYN COOKE.
"See No Invisivo"
Invisivo is super-charged and he's going after president Obama, so, Freakazoid! will stop him, if he can finish Professor's Beasthead's exam on time... and rescue Val from Booger Beast... and shake off Fanboy... and get Fatman out of a manhole... and try Mike's new papaya doughnut with Cosgrove... and -- oh, just forget about it, it's never gonna happen.

Meanwhile, at the backup feature, Lord Bravery has to prove to the HMRC that he doesn't make a profit as a superhero.

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #24
On sale FEB 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by JOHN P. MCCANN and PAUL RUGG art by DUSTIN NGUYEN.
"And they Smell like Mothballs"
The Green Fog and the Brown Fog are back and smellier than ever, so Freakazoid! decided to reunite... THE LEGENDS!... Then again, setting octogenarians to fight might not be a smart idea.

Meanwhile, at the backup feature, the The Huntsman has received his first call from the Justice League Unlimited. Nope, wrong person. They meant to call the Huntress.

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #25
On sale MAR 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by PAUL DINI and TOM RUEGGER art by BRUCE TIMM.
"Witch Girl, the Teenage Witch"
Witch Girl is back at the Harry Connick Jr. High School, the only problem is that nobody remembers her being an evil sorcerer from the 5th dimension. Nobody but Val. So it's up to her to prove it to the gang.

Meanwhile, at the Backup Feature, Professor Jones thinks the Old Whispering Lady stole his collection of pez dispensers, despite Officers Dan and Muhammad-Abdul knowing better, so it's up to Cosgrove to get to the bottom of this goofy dispute.

DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #26
On sale APR 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by PAUL DINI and JOHN P. MCCANN art by ADAM HUGHES.
"Freakazette"
With all the boys letting Bombshell go whenever she commits a crime, Washington needs a new type of hero: Freakazette. Wait... is she Steff... or Val? Special appearance by Foamy and Professor Heiney.

Meanwhile, at the Backup Feature, when Sandra Danger gets possesed by Vorn, the Unspeakable by mistake, the Vatican assigns its toughest agents to the case: the Nunchucks .
DC PRESENTS FREAKAZOID! #27
On sale MAY 12, 32 pg (#4), FC, $2.99 US
Written by JOHN P. MCCANN and PAUL RUGG art by HOWARD PORTER.
"Expendable People"
Art and characters created by lazymills1986.
Candle Jack... Deadpan... Kid Carrion... Ben Franklinstain... The superhero job is way too much for Freak. It's time to get a sidekick. So, Ingmar prepares trials for the most skilled people in sidekick biz: Fanboy, Deadpan, Arrowette, and Expendable Kid must compete with each other to apprehend the Spamming Baby Gang-man

Meanwhile, at the backup feature, the Lawn Gnomes team-up with Etrigan to bully Klarion the Witch Boy, if they can get past Teekl.